As a student, studying is perhaps the thing I want to do the least. Isn't my brain bent over the books enough without turning my devotional time with God into work?
However, studying it is. Isaiah 40 was the chapter I decided to study. I had read this chapter recently in preparation for a Bible study, and struck with its beautiful description of God's relationship with His people. To be honest, in choosing to study this passage at this time, I was killing four birds with one stone: along with using it to meeting my study requirement for Spiritual Formation class, I had selected this chapter to memorize for extra credit in another class, and ultimately, I desired to learn more about God as well as prepare for a day of worship. I decided to set a chunk of time for studying on Sunday morning to take advantage of the time change. Setting my phone for an hour, I found an empty room with a large window, and settled down to study.
All thoughts of the tedium of studying were dispelled when I read the first two verses.
Comfort ye.
Comfort ye my people, saith your God. Speak ye comfortably to Jerusalem, and cry unto her, that her warfare is accomplished,
that her iniquity is pardoned: for she hath received of the Lord's hand
double
for all her sins.
The method of study I chose was to transcribe the chapter. Verse after verse flowed from my pencil, rich with the majesty, love, and glorious incomprehensibility of God. Any unease about studying drained from me, leaving me with peace. No, it was not an epiphanal moment. But it was an hour free of concern, knowing I was turning my attention and desires to God, the most worthwhile activity I could undertake. More importantly, I know that through that time, he was pursuing me, pursuing me with comfort, of all things. It almost sounds blasphemous to say it. So often I feel guilt for not doing my share, for making wrong decisions, for allowing misguided, sinful thoughts to control my actions. I forget that God doesn't just wait for me to turn to Him, but He is constantly, persistently, painstakingly, generously, simply pursuing me. I don't need to struggle, He has accomplished the war, on the cross He took away the burden of my sins, and has not only forgiven me, but paid for me doubly with mercy, love, and acceptance. I forget that He is not only offering me heaven at the end of life, but solace here, in Him. It's not wrong to want to be comforted and affirmed, no, we're made for it, we were made to receive God's validating love and acceptance.
After that experience, I have planned to continue to set aside that hour each Sunday morning. The peace I found also prompted me to try to read at least a chapter of my Bible each day, and find within that chapter a verse to take with me throughout the day. I haven't upheld that commitment yet though. Argh! The good that I wish to do, that I do not do!!! However, those first two verses have upheld me all week when I felt I was too busy to read the Bible. (Yes, I know I wasn't truly too busy, I was putting homework over God.) They would seep into my mind when I was stressing out over deadlines, or felt too exhausted to think critically. God continued to use that one hour I gave to Him to pursue me through the rest of the week. He gave me the last thing I was expecting to find when studying - comfort.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r-Nbt8lCJrk
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